Posts

Cthulhu: The Ultimate Lawn Ornament

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What's big green and available for your lawn? My Cthulhu Sculpture! I am trying to sell my sculpture of Cthulhu. It's a man-sized fiberglass sculpture of one of Lovecraft's Elder Gods. It sits on a wooden base and is ideal for a spooky or horror theme garden. This creature is a sure fire piece of traffic calming as people slow down to check it out.
There are many ingredients in this sculpture. It's foundational architecture was a barbeque stand (reduce, re-use, recycle). The limbs were built with metal and wood. On top, layers of foam and mesh were used to build the shape. Plaster and auto-body filler built up the final. On top of that, many layers of resin and fiberglass were used to give it its hard exterior. I painted and completed the surface.
It comes with a water feature: tapped into a hose, water pours from the boat that Cthulhu has lifted into the air.
Approximate weight is 160 lbs. It is very much made to withstand the elements. The price is $850 a…

Canada Post is Rotten

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After the lock-out and the back-to-work legislation passed, I expected that mail would resume yesterday. At 5PM a Canada Post employee, one who had the whiff of management to her, walked up my steps with two pieces of mail (one junk mail, one bank statement). She knocked on the door and handed me the mail with an apology, "I didn't know where your mailbox was." I replied, "It's that large white box at the bottom of the stairs where people put mailboxes." How can a grown-up human being in Canada not recognize a mailbox? As my daughter suggested, it's like a dairy owner not knowing what a cow looks like. However, it does speak to part of what's wrong with Canada Post. It's run by morons.
I have tried to send some of my crafts via Canada Post. It has been a dodgy prospect. One package could not be delivered because they couldn't find the address. When it came back, I was working by my front door with the door open. I saw the delivery truck pull…

Canucks Riot: A pictorial journey

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Hey-- can't Tasmanian siblings have sex in peace? My fly dance moves make up for my small mis-shaped penis! Watch as the North American Dumb-Ass, clad in shorts considers attacking the man with the gun... Face it: some people cannot handle a world with Peter Mansbridge Tonight on CNN: dumb reporter get attacked by the Hulk. OMG! My BF is swinging from a lamp post like a chimp! 
That's why I totally love him!  How many dumb-asses does it take the get a fire going, anyways? Come to Vancouver: Enjoy our downtown open-air BBQ We'll hide behind this fence! Question: How old are you, mentally?Check it! I'm FOOURR!! Dude! I totally got a picture of that thing I burned, yo! I didn't have the heart to tell him that it didn't read "Hooligan" Man-- this wait for the port-a-potty is taking FOREVER! The irony: Christy Clark is going to need dumb people to get re-elected.
Unfortunately, they riot but they don't vote.

So Long and Thanks For All The Fish

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"... and the dead in Christ shall rise first: Then we which are alive and remain shall be caught up together with them in the clouds, to meet the Lord in the air: and so shall we ever be with the Lord"

According to Harold Camping, the End Times are nigh upon us (again-- he's been pitching The End since 1994 or earlier). The End begins on May 21st, 2011, this time around.

He is giving us advanced warning. On Judgment Day, May 21st, 2011, there begins a 5-month period of horrible torment for all the inhabitants of the Earth. On May 21st, God will raise up all the dead that have ever died from their graves. Earthquakes will ravage the whole world as the earth will no longer conceal its dead (Isaiah 26:21). Don't get your looting shoes out of the closet. May 21st is Zombie Day. The living holy people will still be around the endure the next five months. People who died as saved individuals will experience the resurrection of their bodies and immediately leave this …

Harper Majority. NDP Opposition

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Congratulations to Stephen Harper and the Conservative win of 166 seats. Let me know when you're converting those seats into Borg alcoves.

Bin Laden Dies While Hiding Behind A Woman

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Here's a streaming feed from http://www.news.com.au/world/osama-bin-laden-dead-us-has-the-body/story-fn8ljm6z-1226048335673 :Word is being floated that Bin Laden will be buried at sea: http://blogs.abcnews.com/thenote/2011/05/osama-bin-laden-body-headed-for-burial-at-sea-officials-say.html - I guess Al Qaeda followers are free to visit his grave.
2:31pm It's being reported a woman used by bin Laden as a human shield was also killed. One helicopter used in the raid reportedly had mechanical failure and was destroyed. 2:29pm Egyptian-born doctor and surgeon Ayman al-Zawahri is al-Qaeda's second-in-command expected to succeed Osama bin Laden, Reuters reports.2:26pm There are reports a crowd of a thousand people have gathered at Ground Zero in New York.2:25pm Reuters reports that a US official believes Osama bin Laden's adult son and two other adults were also killed during the raid on his compound.2:24pm The New York Times has published a seven-page obituary for Bin Laden.…

Top Ten Threats Uttered By the Green Party

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There was a claim from a would-be contender in the Saanich-Gulf Islands riding race, that the Green party was threatening this contender in an effort to dissuade her from continuing. Yep: the threatening Green Party. Isn't that an oxymoron? Here are the top ten things I would imagine to sour their opponent's chances:

They blamed the 1970s on the Liberal party of Canada.
All of the Green Party supporters crowded into Beacon Ave and Pat Bay Highway intersection and blocked part of one of the bike lanes.
They claimed that if you don't vote Green, Elizabeth May will come to your house and whine about the televised debates. If she doesn't win, she'll have LOTS of free time.
They've been handing out Michael Ignatieff's pamphlets to scare voters away from voting Liberal.
The Green Party egged the doors of all 60 Liberal voters in Sidney.
Affixing Liberal bumper stickers to pickups so that jerk-wad driving is associated with jerk-wad politicians.

Their statements and veil…